Monday, May 28, 2007

Seasons End

Apocalypse Now was on the telly the other night and as i settle down to write this final entry, a summation of season 2006/2007, the opening title music and scenes fill my head. "This is the end ......" and tropical forests are napalmed into oblivion - for a season that lacked almost everything a melodramatic image to conclude it all.

If i could have i would have napalmed that season




Guess i could just stop now, that about sums the whole thing up ...

Not quite!

Given that the Romanov era is still with us at Tynecastle and last season ( i need to stop thinking of it now as last season - season before last ) was such a powerful and intoxiting brew, it is impossible in my eyes to sum up 06/07 without comparison to 05/06. That i think is part of the problem i have with this newly concluded campaign.
If 05/06 was played out in glorious technicolor, a tragi-drama of epic proportions, sumptous cinematography and a cast of thousands. Then 06/07 flickered by in cracked and ancient sepia a pale ghost of it's predecessor, 90% of which deserved to be left on the cutting room floor.

We had our dramas this year ofcourse, there is no mistaking that but for the most part they were more like watching a disturbed adolescent self harm, than they were like witnessing the crash, bang, wallop of our rampage through the fun fair of the previous year.
It just wasn't fun this year and that is the most damning statement i can make about the whole sorry show.
There is a thought though, could this year have been the Vlad era's troubled adolescence? Are we set to bloom into a fully fledged mature and powerful buck ready to take on the old guard next year?

I will follow last years example and stick to some ordered categories so that this entry doesn't spiral up my trouser leg in a fit of superlatives -

Best goal
This is really tough because goals themselves have been at a premium never mind good ones.
I really like Driver's free kick against Celtic to make it 2 - 0 to the good guys.
Any goal we scored which came as a result of a goal keeping error which pretty much means all goals we scored against Hibs.
Putting my sensible head on though the best goal was Panilla's in the first game at Pittordrie, great team work, fast paced and accurate passing, completed by intelligent and clinical finishing.

Worst Goal
Tough one this for exactly the opposite reason to the first category, i have witnessed too many goals for the opposition this year. I can't really remember any that were as you might say - a thing of beauty. So i will go for the goals that bothered me most.
Aberdeens equaliser a few weeks back at Tynecastle was very painful but not as painful as the Hibs goal in the diddy cup.

Best Game
Not the best game we played but the most exciting and therfeore enjoyable has to the boxing day game against Hibs.

Worst game
Without a shadow of a doubt, even although we took 4 - 0 drubbing from Dundee Utd at Tynecastle later in the season, the worst game Hearts played this season was the 1 - 0 defeat to Hibs at easter Road. Actually i am not even sure if we could count that as a game from Hearts, i left that ground feeling ill. A million miles past frustrating, just awful.

Best Player
There is absolutely no mistaking that Craig Gordon is in a different league entirely to the rest of the Hearts team, but for me he has not had the best of seasons. So i will leave him out because it should have been a no brainer for him to take this accolade, i have to give it to Christophe Berra who has been there 100% through the thickest of the fog this year and never wavered once.

Worst Player
Oh my god where to begin, it would be unfair to point the finger at one of the newer candidates but Philibaitus takes the biscuit, could have gone to baressa i think but it has been so long since he played i have forgotten the horror.

Comedy Moment
It has got to be the post derby day sit in at Easter Road to spoil the party parade. Absolute unfettered genius.

High Point
Through all the troubles of this year we have actually faired better against Hibs than we did last year taking 10 points out of 12 in the league, obviously the 3 wins were fairly high up there, but...
Unfortunately the high point of the season was the 30s before kick-off in the Athens game at Murrayfield.

Low Point
I am tempted to say the following 90 minutes, but no quite.
I have to refer back to the league cup defeat to Hibs, but there have been so many that really hurt that it is hard to single one out. Wait it is not a game, the lowest point was Malofeev / Riabovas handover that never happened - we were in danger of imploding right then.

Best Performance
My brain has stopped working, i can't think of a single game that was any more than OK.

Hero
Don't do hero worship this year

Manager of the year
Once again we have far too many to choose from, i am of the opinion that we have improved since moving to the pairing of Korobochka and Frail that is not to say that we are any good just better than we were.

Vlad's best decision
I could say that Vlad's best decision has been to keep a low profile over the past few months but i guess it has to go to getting rid of Malofeev. When you consider that it was Romanov who appointed Malofeev in the first place then does it count as a good decision when you get shot of him. I don't care, just so long as he doesn't come back.

Vlad's worst decision
Not really a single decision here, his handling of the Riccarton 3 was typical of Vlad at his most intransigent and unreasonable, but that pales into insignificance when you weigh that against 2 of the 3 now playing for Celtic and for next to nothing. Just makes you want to weep.

Best Save
Craig Gordon made a couple of saves against Sparta Prague, just before they scored there were truly breathtaking, each one should have added a 6 figure sum to his value.

Best Team
OK here goes ( i will only use players who were at the club for the 2nd half of the season as i do not hold Hartley or Pressley 100% innocent in their own departures ). This is nigh on impossible, this team does not reflect performances this season, it is just the best i think we could turn out right now.

Gordon
Tall Zaliukas Berra Goncalves
Miko Kingston Aguar Driver
Velicka Bednar

Worst Team
Most annoying team by a mile were St Mirren, Dunfermline have got to be in the running for getting relegated the numpties but for me the worst team were Motherwell, just plain gash.

So there you go that about sums it all up from me, i notice from writing this that my attention has focussed this year more on Hibs than it did last year. That i think is a mark of the change between o5/06 and 06/07 where in the former season our ambitions were loftier than simply being better than our neighbours.
So i hope that next season Hearts will spend once again less time considering how we are fairing compared to our friends in the East

So in readiness for that time

HOOOOOOO ON THE JAMBOS

Roman candles that fizzle out

Depression is not the reason why i have taken so long to write this blog entry - too late now by far so this one is just for completion really.

I refer to the game at Kilmarnock, the last game of the season and Hearts last chance saloon for a eufa cup place. It failed and it failed in a depressing fashion, but again depression is not the reason why i have taken so long to write this entry.



There was a time a couple of weeks back before the end of the season, when there was still a possibility that Hearts could pull the rabbit out of the hat - it went something like .. we win against Kilmarnock and Aberdeen fail to beat Rangers in their very own final day drama.



The venue for me was the previously infallable Riccarton Arms, now demoted to the level of all other normal venues, no longer holding some magical power over games watched there. Now that the shine has gone the pub looks shoddy and downbeaten as it always did before.



A glorious sunny day to end the season on a high if Hearts managed to pull it off but from our perspective it went off like damp roman candle. Hearts started brightly enough with some strong runs into the Killie box by Driver and Bednar, coming close but no cigar. Fairly soon into the game though news came through from Pittordrie that Aberdeen had taken the lead - a cracking strike from ex jambo Scott Severin. From that point on the dampness seeped deep into the gunpowder and the candle merely cast a maroon cloud of smog with no brilliant phosphorous centre to delight our afternoon.
I guess the thought crossed my mind that perhaps we were trying too hard, couldn't relax under the pressure and a goal for us would make all the difference, perhaps it would have but i am not so sure. In anycase Aberdeen scored a second and it was obvious that the Hearts players were well aware of this as they played out the game without the cavalry charge or the explosion of brilliance that would have given us the victory - our challenge just fizzled out in the sunshine as the glory went to the Dons.
Good luck to them really, i am certain they deserve their 3rd place. The only thing i would say is, and this is just what a lot of blue noses threw in out direction last year - Just as we pipped Rangers last year, Aberdeen pipped us for 3rd spot and we have been a disaster area all season, they will not have the same luxury next year.

To kill the day completely Kilmatrnock converted a late penalty to send home beaten and demoralised - a sad end to a sad season.

Monday, May 14, 2007

11th commandment

Nothing happens at Hearts anymore, i can hardly think of anything to write about. There are just no disasters anymore, natural, supernatural or otherwise, externally motivated or self inflicted. Just nothing but the regular football stuff - players getting injured or coming back or getting suspended or appealing so they can play in important games before the seasons climax.
We really need the end of the season so that Vlad can regroup and start another assault, another madcap rampage through Scottish football culture.
Vlad just bought a building in Edinburgh, the old Royal Bank headquarters i believe, £20M so the papers claim - Jesus he's mental isn't he.
If it had not been for the surprise chance of a shot at 3rd place by squeezing past Aberdeen, this season would have silently slipped under the stone it has been hiding behind since the very start.

As the week progressed i became more and more confident that Aberdeen would get a win in one of their remaining games so all i was really looking far in the derby game against Hibs was a good performance and a stonking great horseing for the skinny green.
I can think of no better way to wrap up the season than with your last home game being against Hibs. A few beers in the Caley Sample Rooms before the game just a livener for many more beers afterwards. In there with one of my kids and a Hibs supporter over in the enlightened half of the city for a change - he is generally quite disgruntled with the state of play at Easter Road but pretty much understands the constraints that bind the team. That's it for me that just sums the whole thing up! I asked him if he would swap the the circumstances of both teams, if he would take for Hibs the knife edged danger of having a madman in charge, a throw of the dice. For Hearts would he offer up the stable fiscal policies of a miserly wage cap for the long term stability and imposed mediocrity of the club.
I know which one i favour!
After some debate and an admission on my part that no one in Scotland could take on the gruesome twosome without accepting an unnatural state in order to do so ( neither of those two could take on europe without doing the same, Rangers have tried it and it looks like it is costing them a decade of humble pie ). I still don't think i got a straight answer - but i will answer for him -
"too bloody right i would take the throw of that dice"

It became clear that Scott Brown was not in the Hibs squad, i was ofcourse pleased by this but thinking back now that will be the last time we see him in a derby match which is a bit of a shame really - it would have been good to see him match up against LarryK, if only just the once.
Oh how Hibs missed Scott Brown!
We pontificated over the likelyhood of some bust up with John Collins and Brown resulting in his expulsion from the squad and last game for Hibs already played. As it turned out though Scott Brown had a family loss and was unable to play. Just shows you though there is more potential for intrigue and sabotage at Easter Road than there is at Tynecastle - i am missing it.
Oh how Hibs missed Scott Brown!

And some! that is probably the most inept display by a Hibs team at Tynecastle that i have seen for ages. I seem to remember the 4 - 1 game at Tynecastle last year was a pretty dire display by them, but really on Saturday in that first half they were awful.
As an aside, here's a thought, even after all the depression of this season we have taken more points from Hibs this year 10 out of 12 than we did last year 6 out of 12.
I had just sat down and sadly had missed the Cheers theme over the sound system, when the game kicked of. Amazingly we scored after 30s and it was our 2nd attack! One long ball had gone through to Andy McNeill, the second punted to the left of the box, Pospisil muscled his way between the two stumbling centre halfs more in hope than expectation. His reward was for the ball to drop over his shoulder and down to his feet - hey you make your own luck in this game. Pospisil still had a lot to do but he managed to get a foot round the ball to direct it across the keeper and into the net.
The crowd could hardly believe it, but we enjoyed it just the same.
With Hibs relying far too much on Louis Stevenson - he looks like a good player but it was completely unfair to expect him to carry the whole of the midfield fight to Hearts. Some of Hearts play was almost reminiscent of last years pedigree as we swept forward at every opportunity and attacked from all areas. Fyssas was playing his last game for Hearts and he was really enjoying his run out up the left with Driver ahead of him. Andy McNeill in goal for Hibs made a couple of decent saves then one really good clearance from a Bednar header that looked a goal all the way. Pospisil had another effort well saved and Berra had a good header turned onto the bar, it could have been six by half time.
On the other hand Hibs had a couple of breakaway chances where they really should have scored, most notably a break after a corner to Hearts found the Hibs front two bearing down on - good grief there is only Fyssas at the back! Passes between each other being over hit and delaying just that split second too long found Karipidis screaming in from nowhere to make the challenge and stop the shot an excellent piece of defending but really they should have buried that.
So it is carved in stoney grey granite, the 11th commandment. Which roughly translated from the ancient Hebrew dictates ...

"And the lord spoke, so it shall be unto all the Hibs goalie's and for all eternity, that they shall make an erse of a simple catch when playing against the good guys"

The ball was clipped forward and as Andy Driver chased on as he should, and the Hibs defender did likewise, the the ball was McNeills all the way. He ran out to collect on 16 yards. pious chap that he is the 11th commandment was met as he took his eye off the ball at exactly the moment he should have concentrated hardest. The ball evaded him somehow and allowed Driver to steal in behind, under pressure he did well to take on his right thigh and finish with his left on the half volley.
The crowd could hardly believe it but we loved it just the same.

Half Time

HMFC 2
Old testament zealots 0


Now i was not happy with Hearts 2nd half display, really i thought we just couldn't be arsed. There was an opportunity i thought to really tear that team to shreds, they were 1 or perhaps 2 goals away from a complete collapse. Hearts just didn't pursue and we let go of the tigers tail ( Ok it wasn't a tiger it was a hamster ).
From a Hibs perspective it was a much better second half, where they had a lot more of the ball and put some pressure on Hearts defence. They never managed any real penetration however as Hearts midfield adopted a deeper position and a safety first attitude.

Fyssas left the field after an hour or so and shook every Hearts players hand on the way off. It probably is time for him to go but i for one am sad to see him go. For me last season he more than anyone else signified the step up in stature and quality we were attempting to achieve.

Tall came on for injured Larry Kingston who had had a straightforward decent game. Tall in midfield is just plain crazy but it hardly mattered we just gave Hibs the ball for 2/3 rds of the pitch and then put up the shutters for the remaining 1/3rd - just too easy really.

There had been many renditions of - "your gettin beat by a pub team, beat by a pub team" all of which was just reward for John Collins who had been in a bad mood since the off. He will learn from that i guess and pay other teams a bit more respect in future. Or maybe he won't learn from any of his mistakes, maybe he will just run out of time and get punted by Hibs before October is out, i would not be surprised in the slightest.

Full time

HMFC 2
Hibs 0


So we have one game to go, away to Kilmarnock, pretty simple really. We need to beat kilmarnock which is a racing certainty. Aberdeen play Rangers at Pittordrie, whilst it is true that there is no love lost between that pair, i think Aberdeen's greater need might just carry them over the line, blooody hope not.

So for one last time this season

HOOOOO ON THE JAMBOS

Edge

It is like a little haven of greenery in the middle of Carricknowe, i had no idea it existed but if you can navigate your way to the Primary school deep in the centre of the estate you will come across an opening of playing fields surrounded by a border of mature trees.
Very pleasant surroundings for Sunday mornings encounter between Currie Star and Carricknowe.

Currie have been progressing well of late so the lads and the travelling band of die-hard support were justifiably confident on arrival.
With the game just minutes old and Currie 1 - 0 up confidence was ever higher. The game took a turn, it took a few turns actually and one of them was dark and brooding. Innevitable really, we are talking about boys here ( mostly anyroads ), sooner or later adrenalin pumps to the fore and games can take on an edgy quality, this game became very edgy indeed.
All relative i guess, up until now i can't recall a single incident in any previous game that had even the slightest malice. This one though had and edge.
This is Scotland and we love that sort of thing but i think i could be doing with seeing the lads turn into teenagers before they turn on each other!
I will not point any fingers, whoever started it got as much back as they dished out so all's fair in war and fitba.

All in all it was a fairly evenly matched game with both teams nip and tuck and defences struggling to cope with the end to end barrages, the score quickly raced to something like 4 - 3 to Carricknowe. Currie were perhaps guilty of some defensive lapses that seemed to have been sorted out in previous weeks, this though was countered with an enthusiasm to attack at any opportunity.

Unfortunately for Currie during that middle period Caricknowe managed to get 3 without reply and from then on Currie struggled to keep a hold of the game. A final score of 8 - 5 to Carricknowe just about deserved. The most memorable aspect of this one however will be that unmistakeable acid aroma of the edge.

Monday, May 07, 2007

No Overtaking

Absolutely convinced i was, that all would be OK, that Hearts would win the game this week against Aberdeen and put 1 point between us and real pressure on them. I was really looking forward to the game, full of anticipation without the sickening nervousness to get in the way of the run up.
Larry Kingston, as expected picked up a ban for his racist slur against the referee the last time these two teams met - a 3 game ban sounded like poetic justice given that there were exactly 3 games left of the season and may well have wrapped up Larry's career in a Hearts shirt and packed him up and off to somewhere else - The SFA are a shower of barstewards.
Who knows i sincerely hope that Larry sticks around to see out next season at least, without UEFA football for Hearts we may not be his choice however. As for the ban it was of course immediately appealed .. rant time

A good few dour Aberdonians picked up the blower to various football phone in's to bemoan that the phone in host will have had his tea then! and also that Hearts had no right to appeal the ban on Larry, Hearts should just take their medicine and get on with it. One caller even had the bare faced North Eastern doom-mongery to ask if this was Hearts reaching a new low!?
Well to these punters i state ....

This was as i am sure we will all agree, a tactical appeal to allow Larry to play in as many of these important last few games as possible, with the full understanding that it may result in a harsher sentence being bestowed ( that is the risk taken ). Furthermore every manager of any club would have done exactly the same thing and if not, as a supporter of the club who didn't appeal under those same circumstances i would definitely have asked questions.
My point is not that the appeal is morally just. My point is that this is not something intrinsic or peculiar to Heart of Midlothian Football Club that only we would lower ourselves to make such an appeal, i mean, get real!

Tynecastle was as expected full to capacity and the crowd were expectant of a real battle and willing to play their part in the fight for 3rd spot. Convinced and still am that a win for Hearts would have put too much pressure on Aberdeen, they would crack before the end to allow Hearts to nip in and steal the UEFA cup place. So this was do or die for us, time to put up or shut up. A draw would be a lot more use to Aberdeen than it would be to us so i had prepared myself for a hard slog trying to break down a well organised and hungry Aberdeen side intent on taking their 4 point advantage over us into the last two games. I suppose given those last two games for Aberdeen are against the ugly sisters i can see now why the play for a draw and hope for a win tactic was not their favoured option.

I was entertained by the banner over in the Aberdeen end which had the logo ...

along with the respective points totals and current league positions, well once i had worked it out any roads. For a while i pondered - christ have Aberdeen finished 3rd 61 times and Hearts 4th 57 times no way! and even if they had what anal mentalist would have had the compulsive disorder to work it out and paint a banner about it. DOH !

Now that i have taken account of what the Hearts do rather than the bloody huddle we used to do, i am not so sure the huddle is such a bad idea. The players danced around the centre circle in some broken square dance attempting to double handedly high five each and every one of each other. Tell me what is wrong with the good old fashioned - take up your position on the park, shout encouragement at your team mates and scream threatening abuse at the opposition?

After some early pressure from Hearts Aberdeen settled into the game and dominated the midfield for most of the first half, during this time they created a number of decent chances and must have been aggrieved to go in at half time without scoring never mind a goal down!
But that is how it was, Aberdeen had a great cross and header crash off the post, a shot just over and a whole load of other chances that may have come to more than they did. A lot was coming down their left wing where Karipidis was getting skinned every time, he did not look comfortable at all. Kancelkis was inside of him and was enduring his own crisis. A crisis mostly self induced mind you as he set about making an enemy of the ref for not much reason at all. After his booking and post booking talking too from the ref Gordon was desperately signalling to the bench to get him subbed off before he got sent off. This appeal was ignored by the bench until half time when he was replaced by Tall. With Tall inside him Karapidis had a much happier second half. No explanation for that just how i seen it?
You couldn't really say that Hearts goal was against the run of play, it just sort of came out of no where. A plus for us was the return of Bednar up front to accompany Velicka, a minus however was a return to a more arial game with lots of long balls aimed up to the front two. Was this something to do with Bednar up front, i hope not because it is not the best part of his game, not by a long shot. Nevertheless it was one of those arial launches that, not dealt with allowed Velicka to slip through the left channel and in on goal, still with lots to do, under pressure and with the angle tightening he managed to crash the ball under the keeper. Very like the second goal at Easter Road earlier in the season to steal that 2 - 2 draw against Hibs. So similar in fact that a round of "are you Zibby in disguise" belted from the Wheatfield Stand. Much more a round of our euro anthem engulfed Tynecastle, the first time we have heard that one for a good few months now and a sure sign that belief was in the air. We needed another goal in this encounter though and that's where the trouble starts.

Half Time
HMFC 1
Aberdeen 0

Aberdeen must have been pretty gutted at going in a goal down but you wouldn't have known from the second half, it was pretty much role reversal. Hearts the more dominant, with the lions share of possession and chances. A fair shout for a penalty as Driver drove into the box, defender sprawling under his feet he clearly handled the ball as Driver attempted to round him. Referee unimpressed and neither were the Tynecastle faithful. A few more chances, efforts on goal but the clear cut chance just was not coming, a combination of decent defending and the wrong ball at the wrong time meant that as the game wore on it became ever more nervous, that nervousness osmosis like drifted up the stands as the game entered it's final stages.
A break down the right and a cross far to the back post opened out a clear opportunity for Aberdeen, a well struck shot just over the bar - That was their chance i muttered under my breath!
Brewster had come on and as is his want he set about setting about the Hearts defence, with only a couple of minutes left he created the opening - again down the right for another cross to the back post, this time crashed into the top of the net for the all important equaliser. The Red Ultras as they like to call themselves enjoyed that one. I am beginning to fail to remember the last time Aberdeen did not get it right up us in the last few minutes of a game at Tynecastle - oh aye, the same fixture this time last year!

Funny old game but i am not so sure that it really makes that much difference - Aberdeen still need to take 2 points from their two remaining games, assuming Hearts win both ours mind you.
With Celtic horsed by Her Royal Ugliness and a Scottish Cup final coming up surely they will need to start playing football again and i just don't see Rangers doing them any favours. We might yet just sneak it.
Brutally honest here - Aberdeen deserve their UEFA spot it will surely be a steal if we manage to wrestle it from them - get the tights over yer heads and swag bags at the ready.


HOOOO ON THE JAMBOS

Smells like team spirit

There was an unwelcome return to some inclement weather at Kingsknowe this Sunday morning for Currie Stars game ( i apologise for not knowing the name of the opposition - they played in red - i will call them Reds for the sake of our understanding ). In truth it was an archetypal Scottish spring day - blustery with sunshine and showers and the fabled 4 seasons in one day was born true. After last weeks wonderfully mild and sunny Sunday morning this one was hard work to deal with. It is just as well then that Currie Star once again served up a tremendous display to take our minds off the 'brolly or no brolly cos it's too windy' unsolvable conundrum.

Currie Star needed no time at all to take the game by the scruff of the neck forcing Reds back into their own half from the kick off. There is a level of understanding between the boys Currie Star these days that just wasn't there at the start of the season and is now making them a formidable outfit for anyone to take on. That organisation allowed Star to dominate the Reds in the first ten minutes culminating in a well struck and very well deserved goal.
Reds had a few good players and a couple of really exellent footballers in their team though so it was no surprise really when they forced their way back into the game. After a few sorties down both flanks Currie Star were rocking a little and succumbed to breakaway goal midway through the first half - at that time the draw was entirely correct on the balance of play.
Currie Star have something in their locker which has been evident for the last few months, along with the organisation and understanding there is also a spirit, defiance and fight about them. Within a minute of Reds equaliser, Currie Star picked up a Reds corner on the edge of their own box and made headway at pace down the right flank, It is wonderful and mental at the same time to watch football at this stage - it was the left back who was making this run as right wing-back. The lad galloped up the wing with Reds midfield and defence chasing him down, 20 yards out he cut inside a yard or two and drove a low shot under the keeper and into the corner of the net. A great effort and great goal.

That same left back has a habit of, when facing his own goal and under extreme pressure, he will put his foot on the ball and turn round rather than horse the ball out of the park. He has about an 80% success rate. In my head i always scream 'just get rid', i guess it is burned into my psychy but surely i should encourage the cultured option over the agricultural hoof. It's my boy though and when he gets caught in possession my heart is in my mouth, no idea why i should bother cos he just gets on with it and next time gets them back.

The second half produced more dominance from Currie and more dangerous play on the break from Reds. One more goal for Currie and a great 3 - 1 victory.